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I was going about my day at work when I overheard one of my female colleagues gushing over a picture of a handsome guy on Instagram.
“Look at that jawline! I bet he can get a job easily with that handsome face.”
It got me thinking, if this man were here at the office, would this female colleague of mine say the exact same thing to him in person?
The next thing that came to mind? Men and compliments. It seems like a very rare combination.
Why is that?
As for my colleague, it’s not like she was being flirty about her compliment. It sounded like a genuine comment on how handsome this guy was.
Still, I wondered how often this guy received compliments from women.
Genuine compliments are usually the ones that come to mind when you admire something about a person the moment you see them. It could be the shirt that they’re wearing, their new pair of shoes, or the recent haircut they got.
“That’s a really cool shirt!”
“Wow! Those shoes look great on you!”
“That’s a nice haircut! Which barber shop did you go to?”
Flirty compliments, on the other hand, have more intent. A lot of women tend to do this when they’re trying to catch the attention of the person they like.
“That’s a handsome suit you’re wearing. I bet you dress even better on a date.”
“You have a way with words. I like it when a man can talk smart.”
“I love those brown eyes of yours. I wouldn’t mind staring at them all day.”
Compliments like these can also be genuine. You can tell if it’s flirty based on the woman’s tone and her body language.
Some ladies go so far as giving you a seductive smile, batting their eyelashes at you, or twirling their hair as they give you a compliment.
This therefore begs the question: Do men like compliments from women? Do they like compliments in general?
Now, I tried looking up some samples of compliments that women usually give men. I was surprised to find that most of the results, if not all, were catered to men on how to compliment women.
It took a while to find what I was looking for, so I decided to come up with my own examples. Of course, I considered my words carefully based on whether I would actually say such things if I was trying to flirt with a guy that I liked.
But then I realized it was difficult for me to come up with compliments too. Not because I rarely give them, but it’s something that isn’t really second nature to me. Unlike with men, for some reason it’s easy for them to compliment women.
If someone asked me if it was easy for me to compliment a guy, I would probably say sure!
The thing is, when I compliment a guy, it’s usually out of being nice. No significant meaning behind it. I figure I would say something nice to a guy, and that’s it.
But for a guy, any guy, receiving compliments from women is rare. So when they do get them, it leaves them in shock or in awe.
As I was doing my research on the subject, I found an article where men shared their experiences after receiving a compliment from a woman.
I was touched to see that so many of these men feel like their lives had changed after someone told them something as simple as “You have a great smile.”
It is so rare for them to receive wholesome or flirty compliments from women. They’re not used to it. A lot of women have become used to it too.
One guy, for example, shared that he doesn’t get complimented at all. But one day some cute girl told him, “You’re really funny, I like you.”
He then cried for ten minutes when he got back home.
Even if this story isn’t true, it’s not hard to believe that such a scenario could actually happen.
Some men might not even know that they were given a compliment because they’ve gotten used to not getting one.
Even a dad will feel elated when he’s told that his kids are lucky to have him as their father. It’s not hard to imagine, is it?
This is how rare men receive compliments. And most of the time, when they do receive a compliment, they are ecstatic about it.
Though a man is perceived to be the alpha in the relationship, family, or workplace, it still moves him to hear a simple compliment from the opposite sex. It makes him feel seen and valued.
Men are used to carrying the burden of “being a man,” so they work hard every day to achieve their goals. Every accomplishment is meaningful to them because then they can tell themselves that they did their job.
But a lot of the time, they get so caught up in work or family life that they don’t have the time to think about whether anyone else notices how hard they work or how much effort they put into looking nice for work or for a date.
This is one of the sad realities of “being a man.” You have to suck it up and do what’s expected of you. And if you get a compliment for it, that’s just a huge bonus.
I’ll be honest. I don’t know if all men like receiving compliments from women. But based on the experiences I’ve had with the men in my life – friends, exes, siblings, etc. – I can say that a lot of men would love to hear a compliment from a woman every now and again.
You never know how a simple “Hey, how are you? You look great today!” can do for a man. Plus, it’s so easy to do.
We can even make it more meaningful by adding a short “I hope you have a wonderful day at work!” or “I look forward to hanging out with you this weekend!”
Men and compliments go well together when it’s being directed towards women. But women have the power to change that.
How? By breaking stereotypes. By choosing to make men feel good about themselves because they are good.
One thing’s for sure, there are men out there who deserve it. When you do find them, give them a compliment. Make their day.
So, to all the women who are reading this right now, ask yourselves:
When was the last time you gave a man a compliment?
This article was originally published on Medium: Do Men Like Receiving Compliments from Women?
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